I think sometimes we overshare because we think that’s what we’re supposed to do.
I think sometimes we allow people to vent for too long because we’d feel like a bad friend if we stopped them.
I think sometimes we continue exposing ourselves to unworthy people because were terrified of disconnection.
We violate our boundaries when we partake in experiences that are at the cost of ourselves.
We can even feel like we are (betraying ourselves) when we do finally recognize our boundaries but continue to violate them.
But what if we had to betray ourselves in order to survive?
What if our caregivers withheld love from us when we stood our ground about something?
What if we were punished or shamed for having limits or needs?
What if no one taught us or modeled how to stay connected to ourselves while we connect to others?
These are all extremely valid reasons why anyone would be terrified of having boundaries.
If you resonate with of this, I encourage you to start gently.
I invite you to honor the magnitude of resistance that will likely be present for you as you begin this practice.
Setting new boundaries may trigger painful feelings from your past.
It can bring up times when your boundaries were (not) allowed to exist.
That is normal and expected.
I am sending you so much love and healing and gentleness as you begin to discover and honor your sacred boundaries.
What would you add to this list?
p.s. If you would like deeper support around the topic of boundaries, make sure to check out my boundaries program.